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I'm not anyone's first choice. I'm not anyone's favorite. People may tell me I mean a lot to them but I know there's someone they will always choose over me.

bekstek:

mintike:

IM GOING TO STAB MYSELF IN THE FOOT I JUST SENT MY ENGLISH TEACHER MY ESSAY ON HAMLET AND IT WAS STILL NAMED “the fresh prince of denmark yo holla”

oh man, i love receiving unedited final drafts:

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cracks me up every time

aleighx:

  • LAUGHING SO HARD OVER THE MOST RIDICULOUS SHIT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, CLUTCHING THEIR STOMACHS, SNORTING AND STRUGGLING TO BREATHE
  • Person A leaving tHIGH HICKEYS ON PERSON B (ી(΄◞ิ౪◟ิ‵)
  • BOTH OF THEM BEING THE BEST FRIENDS THAT EVERYONE JUST ASSUMES IS A COUPLE AND NO…

raikagay:

remember like 2 years ago when christmas stopped feeling like christmas for some reason

japhers:

the characters are fictional but the thirst is real

inFamous: Second Son + Photo Mode (57/??)

slimiest:

a CEO walks into his office “any messages?” he asks his assistant
“two anons want to know who tom petty is and one just says ‘post your ballsack’”
“got it. check my dashboard”
“that skeleton gif you like is back again”
he rubs his chin pensively “mm. reblog that”

jaydenw:

Here’s a fun april fools day prank you can do. Sneak into my room and place thousands of dollars everywhere. Just on everything. Cover my things with an insane amount of money. Make it a real hassle to clean up. The more money the better the prank.

vulcan-ology:

best medical crew in the ‘fleet, clearly.

Assassin’s Creed Unity - Arno’s Training